Before my son was born I prayed that he would be a leader among men. I prayed for him to have integrity and a heart for God and others. I prayed that he would help those in – and that he would stand up for others, those that maybe cannot do so for themselves, as well as for his own beliefs. I prayed for him to be kind, loving, gentle yet firm. I prayed for him to do mighty and wondrous things in God’s name.
Within his first year of life I began witnessing some of these things come into fruition and through his short three years here on this earth I’ve seen it multiple. Just last week, as I was walking him into school he turned to me and said, “Stay here mommie.” I was shocked. “Stay here?” I asked, “Stay here mommie.” he repeated, this time throwing his hands in front of me to stop me. I stood baffled. He took his lunch box from me, slung his backpack – which is as big as he is I might add – over his back and walked himself into the gym at school. Of course I walked behind him and made sure the teacher knew he was there. How was this happening? He only turned 3 in April! As the tears stung my eyes I made my way back to my car before breaking down. I was so proud and so sad at the same time. How could my little boy be so independent? But he is, fiercely so. In all honestly, he’s been independent since he could crawl, so this shouldn’t have been a surprise. He has to do everything himself, if you help him and he doesn’t ask for it he will do it (whatever it is) all over again.
He is determined and knows what he wants, but he is loving and kind. Last week we went out to eat at a small establishment we’ve been going to for years. The owner let my son, GG, play with his son’s toy. When his son returned i could tell that he wanted his toy back. GG, being the 3 year old that he is, did not want to give up said toy. “It’s my toy.” He said while looking defiantly at his dad and I. In my head I’m thinking, “… here we go, full on meltdown on the way..” I explained to him that the toy was in fact the little boy’s. That the little boy let him play with it. My son took this all in and you could see his mind working around this, trying to understand. Finally it clicked. He got down and walked halfway to the owner of the toy, but then came back. Again, I explained and pointed out how nice it had been for him to share his toy. This time GG walked to the table where the little boy sat. Again he walked back to us with the toy. A few minutes later my son walked back to the table where the toy’s little owner was sitting and place the toy on the table, he turned back to us and got halfway before he began crying. My husband swooped him up and we praised him. Needless to say we took him to the store to pick out a toy!! Here’s the thing – at 3 years old it took him a few times, but he got it and he wanted to do the right thing even though it was extremely hard for him to do. At 3 years old he has more integrity than some adults I’m come across in life.
I’m raising a leader. A strong-willed (wild) child. He never stops. He pushes and questions everything. Everything seems to turn into a fight at some point or another. That’s when my husband points out, “You prayed for this.” Yes, yes, I did. I prayed for this wonderful, determined, strong willed, wild, sweet, loving, silly little future leader. I wouldn’t have him any other way. He is perfection to me even on the days where I feel like I’m failing as a mother – when I’m tired and frustrated and feel like I’m doing it all wrong. All he has to do is give me a smile or wrap his little arms around me for a hug and nothing else matters. He is everything I prayed for and more and I cannot wait to see the man he becomes. Until then I will remember to enjoy every single moment.